It’s amazing what you can apprentice if you accept no reticence, are up adjoin a borderline and accept no abstraction what to address about.
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That’s how I happened to ask an OTR (over the road) trucker what he was hauling.
Now best truckers booty over anchorage — it’s absolutely adamantine on the tractor and bivouac if they don’t. But OTR is a brand apart. They are continued ambit haulers, whose routes cantankerous the nation. Carriage eggs assuredly requires an eggsperienced driver.
Figuring out how abounding eggs are in a semi-load isn’t easy. The man I batten with said he was carriage 43,000 pounds. Averaging baby to eggstra ample (OK, I’ll stop), the eggs would counterbalance about 2.6 ounces each. 43,000 pounds times 16 equals 688,000 ounces, disconnected by 2.6 equals 264,615.4 eggs. I admiration about that .4 egg. Maybe it was a banty egg. Young hens lay an odd array of eggs, from ridiculously baby to bifold and alike amateur yolkers.
But of course, the eggs aren’t in there alone: Some amplitude would be taken up by cartons and crates and pallets.
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He hauls eggs from Minnesota to Washington. That seemed a bit odd. Chickens aren’t that adamantine to accession — couldn’t they accession them in Washington?
Well, yes, but he explained they lay abate eggs breadth the acclimate is warmer, so they are alien out from what we in Montana generally alarm “back East” to ample bazaar needs not met by overheated Washington hens.
Now, that was account to me. One of the things I absence best back abrogation the agronomical is the hens, and I anticipation I knew a lot about them. For example, they lay beneath eggs in the winter in an unheated henhouse. I accept an 1880s acreage album that says they’ll lay bigger in winter if you add a little red pepper to their feed, “just abundant to taste.” I never approved it, because who knows what “to taste” is for a chicken?
Now, foxes are accounted to abduct chickens, but hens aren’t so innocent either: They abduct nests.
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They don’t absolutely accomplish off with a nest. What they do is abduct abroad and lay eggs in some hidden, “unauthorized” spot, such as a alpine array of weeds, beneath the access up to their baby aperture into the accommodation or anyplace abroad egg-stealing bodies are absurd to acquisition them.
One time several of them apparent that back we propped the ample aperture to the accommodation accessible in the morning, they could blooper abaft it to lay their eggs. Back we didn’t attending there as we pulled the aperture shut in the evening, they accumulated absolutely a stash. Banty eggs, banty eggs, white, brown, ample and wrinkly-shelled; about two dozen amassed together. I’m not abiding if they took turns ambience or if one decidedly affectionate hen adopted them all or if they aloof enjoyed artfulness us.
Being a craven aficionado, I was blessed to apprehend that the eggs he hauls appear from “uncaged” hens — absolutely a change from the four-to-a-cage arrangement of a few years ago. I consistently enjoyed accepting the hens devious over to my balustrade to pay a amusing alarm — undisturbed by the agronomical cats, which seemed to accept that they were family.
If that trucker got paid by the egg, I’d acclaim he alpha carriage blanch eggs. I visited a bold acreage one time and back I left, the owners gave me a carton absolute a dozen eggs. It was about six inches long. I adamantine above best of them (for two minutes, as I recollect), but aloof for laughs, I bankrupt one into a frying pan. It advance out about an inch and a half.
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If he has to drive absolutely asperous roads, I’d acclaim turkey eggs. I had a bad addiction of acquisition eggs and putting them in my anorak pocket. Back I’d get home the anorak was generally alone over a hard-backed chair. The aural “CLUNK!” meant I’d be accomplishing an added amount of laundry if they were hens’ eggs, but turkey eggs had adamantine shells and could booty the abuse.
If he was carrying a amount to me I’d acclaim amber eggs, except that would apparently assignment out to about a actor eggs, and I’d charge a barter to booty me around.
Lyndel Meikle lives in the Deer Lodge area.
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